Second Chance, First Chance
by HopelessRomantic79
Summary: Edward has loved Bella all his life, but the opportunities keep passing him by. Now he's divorced and she's widowed- will he finally take the chance he's been waiting for for 40 years? O/S


**A/N: This came out of nowhere. Well, not nowhere. A conversation with EmmaleeWrites05 about Colin Firth inspired this fic, and she was awesome enough to beta it for me, but God knows it has nothing to do with Colin Firth. Well, not anymore it doesn't. Anyways... Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Only a distinguished Edward belongs to me. ;-)**

**EPOV**

"Will you bring that bottle of wine in Edward, ooh and grab the stopper on the counter! The one Garrett brought me home from Italy. It's silver..."

"I know which one Bella, I was there when he gave it to you."

"Oh, right." Her voice was slightly muffled, and even though we were a room apart, I could tell she had her head in the pantry, rooting around for something for our night in.

For as long as I could remember, Isabella Swan-Whitlock had been my best friend. We'd been together through everything; sandboxes, bad grades, bullies, bad skin, dances, teenage angst, graduations (high school and college), weddings (to other people), babies, crappy jobs, mortgages, divorce (me), death (her husband), and now we were living side by side as house mates, well into our fifties, gray hair and vitamin supplements and everything.

And through all of that, I'd never once told her just how desperately in love with her I was. She knew I loved her, I knew she loved me... but I'd never once told her how she even outshone my ex-wife, how she was the most important person in my life. I mean there's only so much you can tell your best friend.

From the start, right when we'd met at Forks Elementary School in Ms. Cope's first grade class, I'd loved her. She was pretty, sweet and shared her crayons with me. Somehow, we'd been stuck with the other ever since and now I could scarcely remember a single thing that didn't involve Bella in some way.

And now we were preparing for a tradition that had been passed on over the decades. A tradition that had varied slightly; first in the theatres when it cost just a quarter, then shared with boyfriends and girlfriends in the drive-ins, later with family friendly VHS' for the kids, and now just the two of us. Movie night with Bella was sacred, essential.

Tonight we had a full spread. We were going European to celebrate her son Garrett's acceptance to an abroad program to a university in France. He was out celebrating too, but probably not in the same way we were. Let's just say he was going to miss his girlfriend, Kate, a whole lot while he was gone. Bella was adorably oblivious to the fact that her little boy was a sexual creature, so I had to take the role of father and pass along the condoms. It was amazing, how fast a twenty year old kid could blush.

"We've got the crackers, the cheese, the grapes, the wine, a little bit of chocolate..." Bella was balancing a full load of snacks in her arms, and I moved to help her, taking some things out of her hands and walking it to the coffee table. "Oh Edward, this looks great! I love the little candles and where was this hiding? I haven't seen this tablecloth in years. I thought Tanya-" She stopped, eyes wide. "Sorry!"

"It's been five years, she's not Voldemort, you can say her name," I chuckled and Bella relaxed. "Really, it's fine."

She gave me a sweet smile that had always got my pulse to race, and arranged the rest of the things on the table quickly. "Now, what were we going to watch first?" She held up a stack of movies in her hands, rifling through them. I took that moment to take her in. There were streaks of gray in her hair now, almost silver in the candlelight and it was pulled up like she had when we were teenagers. It made me want to taste her neck. She was just as beautiful to me now as she had been when we were seven.

"_Amelie_?" she asked, clueless to the fact that I'd been giving her the once over. Like always. I'd been looking at her that way for over forty years now and she'd never once noticed.

"Who?"

"It's a movie, Edward. It's all in French. It's a lovely film."

"Lemme see that box." I took it, feeling our fingers brush together as we passed the box, and as always, my breath got stolen briefly. Thousands of times, this had happened. Thousands of times, I had let it pass by without a word. Like I was saying, tradition.

"How about _The Pink Panther_? The Blake Edwards original, of course," I suggested after reading the back of the movie and deciding there was probably too much estrogen soaking in it for my liking tonight.

The movie began, and since I'd seen it a million times before, I let my mind wander a bit. Remembering all of the opportunities I'd had, just like this, to make my move, all the times I let it slide by me. There had been moments; times I was going to say something. Risk everything for a chance to be with her. When I was twelve, I was going to ask her to our very first sock hop in the sixth grade, but my mother Esme had interrupted us with a plate of cookies and an invitation to watch Adam 12. At fourteen we'd hidden in a closet, pretending to have our seven minutes in heaven, but we'd talked instead. The entire time, I'd been wishing I could actually do it, actually kiss her. I think she'd gone in with James DuBois that night and had the seven minutes for real. Then when we were sixteen, I wanted to ask her out to the county fair, but Jasper had gotten to her first and once they were together, they were in it for the long haul. They loved each other, and he'd given her three beautiful kids and a wonderful life. I loved Garrett, Riley, and Rachel like they were my own. I could never resent her relationship with Jasper any more than I could truly regret my marriage to Tanya, as ill-fated as it was. After my divorce and Jasper's death, the timing had never been right; it had never seemed appropriate or right to say anything. My passion was for the young, not the old man I was turning into more and more daily. I'd missed my chance, over and over, and now it seemed like it was too late.

"Edward, you're missing the movie," Bella said, picking up a cracker and taking a large bite. "Oh man, I need chocolate."

I snapped out of my thoughts and turned to her. She was now moaning, licking at her lips as she finished chewing on a tiny bit of French chocolate. Goddamn it. I may not be a spring chicken anymore, and it might take me a little longer to get there than it used to, but I had never been immune to Bella, and the sounds she was currently making were definitely stirring things inside me.

Hell, who was I kidding? Her bending over to pick up the morning paper each dawn before we packed up for work was a turn on. Watching her cook, seeing how deeply she loved her kids, how she interacted with my own kids, Maggie and Charlotte. Coming home to her on the couch, nose buried in her case files or in some new book she'd picked up on her way home... all of these things turned me on.

But this chocolate thing... my God. "T-taste good?" I asked, swallowing hard.

"Yeah, want a bite?" She broke off a chunk and held it to my mouth. "Open up."

It was an innocent enough move. It had happened a hundred times before. But I couldn't help the groan that passed my lips as her fingers brushed them, the way I still wanted her, had always wanted her. "That's good," I rasped, and chewed slowly, watching her lean back in place on the couch.

She was quiet again, but I could feel her eyes on me. "Are you OK?" she finally asked, reaching for the remote to pause the movie.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"You seem... off. You're not laughing like you always do." Just like I could read her, she could read me. I shrugged dismissively and pretended to watch the movie some more, but Bella was having none of it. "No really, please, tell me. Something's off and I don't know what." She frowned. "Didn't we promise to always be honest with each other?"

On the playground, when we were eight, we made that promise. Except for my one glaring omission, I'd always been honest with Bella. "I'm fine."

"Edward Anthony Cullen, stop being an ass and tell me what's bothering you!" Her warm brown eyes were focused on me as I swallowed.

"I'm just... frustrated," I finally said. I knew it wouldn't be enough to satisfy her, but that would be all she was getting.

She frowned. "Why?"

I sighed deeply. I hated knowing I was upsetting her and I could already see I was. I knew at this moment she was running through every possible scenario, from a deadly illness I hadn't told her I had, to a secret love child I'd fathered in Indonesia, to a wild party I was planning on hosting, to an office scandal I'd magically find myself a part of. Once when I told her I had a surprise for the new house we were now sharing, she'd assumed I meant I was going to build her a room full of whips and chains for an S&M lifestyle. I'd bought her a potted plant.

"It's too late, don't worry about it, let's watch the movie," I insisted, reaching for the remote. She swatted my hand away.

"It's never too late Edward," she smiled. "Whatever it is, just go and get it." She grabbed her wine glass and took a long sip. "Of course, I seldom listen to my own advice."

"You have regrets you can't take back either huh?" I chuckled.

"Oh of course I do," she sighed, taking another sip. "Don't we all?" She turned back on the movie and we both pretended to watch, but it was clear neither of us were into it anymore. "I think I'm going to turn in now," she said, ten minutes before the movie was over. "Sleep well Edward."

"Night Bella."

* SC *

The next morning was a Saturday, so neither of us had work. I'd planned on tooling around in the garage, maybe work on my '67 Mustang for a bit, something to do, something to get my mind off of Bella and what I'd been thinking of last night.

I found Bella in the kitchen, pouring herself a glass of orange juice, pulp free of course. She was looking down at the paper, and I had to warn her before the glass overflowed, and she shot me a grateful look. "I was just looking at the events for today, see if there was anything worthwhile going on today, but I'm not really seeing anything I want to do."

"Bella, we live in Seattle, there has to be something to do today."

She laughed. "One would assume."

We got our breakfast ready and sat together at the table in front of a large bay window that overlooked our little fenced backyard. It wasn't much, but there was a large bush in one corner, and a space for the barbecue in the other and that was enough. It kept my brother-in-law Emmett pleased enough for family events, since he was the self-appointed Grill Master, at least. "You know, we should do something with this backyard," I finally said.

Bella looked up from her paper to look out the window. "I suppose you're right," she said. "After all, Riley said he was going to bring his new girlfriend over in a couple of weeks, and it is spring."

"We could go to the nursery," I suggested. "I'm not saying we do the whole HGTV thing, but we could do something."

"Sure," she beamed. It didn't seem to matter to either of us that it was misting outside. We were from Forks, after all. If you waited until the sun shone, you'd never get anything done.

An hour later found us at the local nursery. Bella didn't have the green thumb her mother had, but she had inherited her curiosity. She flitted around the store, asking clerks for their advice, other patrons for their opinions; even stooping to ask a little boy what he thought would be the best flower to impress a girl. He'd blushed and pointed to a flat of purple pansies. She nodded soberly and thanked him, smiling at the child's mother as they walked away. She was so good with people, it seemed effortless. It made my chest ache a little to watch her.

We picked up a few native plants for the yard, mostly shrubs, and then a couple of hanging baskets with fuchsias, hydrangeas, and the purple pansy the boy had picked out. Bella was grinning as we packed it all into my Volvo. "It's going to look so nice, I hope Riley likes it. And Vicki too."

I wrapped my arm around her shoulders in a half hug. "I'm sure they will, Bella."

She smiled back up at me and my heart started to race like I was an adolescent again. I wanted to kiss her, badly. Her lips were full and pink and wet, and my eyes narrowed in on them in an instant. A moment later she was walking to the passenger side of the car and my moment had passed again. Another chance not taken.

* SC *

Riley looked exactly like his father. Tall, filled out and that self-assured air about him that made everyone instantly like him. He had Bella's eyes. He was twenty-five, in grad school for bio-engineering, and had a knack of finding odd things, like the Rainier beer belt buckle he presented to me upon arrival to our house.

Vicki was beautiful, a mess of wild red hair and a sassy grin that instantly let me know that Riley would be a goner over her, if he wasn't already. She reminded me of Tanya; all fire and attitude and confidence. Vicki had lived in Thailand, worked on a boat out of Anacortes, and never drank caffeine. Riley looked like he'd been hit by lightning, and I could sense there would be a wedding in the making soon.

"Oh, she liked my flowers," Bella sighed as she waved goodbye to her eldest son and possibly future daughter-in-law.

Before I could think about it, I'd pulled her into my arms and kissed her forehead. This in and of itself wasn't unusual, but the fact that it had come so instantly, so comfortably and so out of place was. Bella let out a little gasp of air, but then wrapped her arms around me in a familiar and warm hug.

I don't know how long we stood there, my head resting on top of hers, just standing in the doorway of the home we now shared, but something shifted in those moments. Bella eased back but didn't leave the circle of my arms, and looked at me. My eyes never left her gaze and I could feel my pulse pick up. Her lips parted slightly and my control was beginning to wane.

"Bella?" I whispered.

"Yeah?" she whispered back.

"I want to try something... is that alright?"

She nodded mutely and I took that as a yes. Now was the moment. If I didn't take it now, I never would, and I didn't think I could keep on living life without knowing how her lips felt. I was fifty-four, and Goddamn it, I wanted to kiss the woman of my dreams.

I took it slowly, wanting to make sure if she wanted to back out, she had plenty of time. No regrets. But she never pulled away. I felt light-headed.

Her lips were soft as mine finally descended over hers. So much softer than I'd ever imagined, and God, I'd imagined them in every way, in every place. I kissed her again, this time with more pressure, massaging her lips with mine, pulling her body flush against mine. She let out another tiny gasp and practically flung herself at me, wrapping her arms tightly around my neck and pulling my head down closer to her. It was a movie kiss now, passionate but still chaste. Too chaste. I wanted to kiss my Bella the way I'd always imagined kissing her.

I ran my tongue along the seam of her lips and she seemed to get the idea, parting her lips when I did it again and opening herself up to me. God, she was exquisite, more than I'd ever hoped to wish more. Her tongue played with mine and I groaned into her mouth. I was clinging to her now; we were both holding each other up. If I had any doubts that Bella didn't want to kiss me, they were all squelched now. She was just as eager, just as willing as I was.

All too soon, we needed air, but I kept my lips on her, exploring her face, her neck, her collarbone. I needed the contact. I needed her. I couldn't deny it any longer.

"Edward," she moaned. "Oh God..." Her fingers dug into my shoulders as she held on. I steered us towards the couch. Whether we talked or went out it some more, we both needed something solid underneath us. She pounced once we were seated, and we kissed some more. I liked the way she thought. My hands ran up her jean-clad thighs, trying to get her closer. I wanted all of her, every inch of her.

"Bella, I..." Her lips were on mine again before I could even finish my sentence. We needed to talk but maybe we'd done too much talk. Maybe now it was time for action. Fucking finally.

"Bedroom, now," she moaned against my lips and before I could process anything, she was tugging on my hand and leading me to her room. "Please," she sighed as she sunk down in the middle of her bed, reaching out to me. "You have no idea how long..."

She never finished her sentence, because I was on her in the next moment. We'd waited long enough. The button on her jeans couldn't come undone fast enough, and my shirt proved difficult to remove as she fumbled with the buttons. "I'll re-sew them on for you," she laughed as she tugged the fabric aside, sending buttons flying across the room. Her hands found the hair of my chest and she curled it around her fingers as we kissed again. I was trying to get her shirt off, to feel skin on skin, but she was more interested in kissing, so for the moment, I indulged her. It wasn't as if I didn't want to kiss her either, far from it. I just wanted to be a lot more naked when I did it.

Soon though, I got the ball rolling again, and got her legs free of her jeans. Her hand moved between us to stroke my dick- which was mercifully at full attention by now- and then slid the zipper down achingly slow. "Oh God, hello there," she sighed, biting her bottom lip when she pulled me free.

If I had been thirty years younger, I would have said something witty. Something sexy. Something confident. That was gone now, and when she pumped my cock in her hand slowly, any word I might have been capable of flew out the window. Instead I kissed her hard and reached into her panties to see if she was ready.

She was dripping wet and more than ready, I could tell. She hummed with pleasure into my mouth and rolled her hips towards my hand. "Please Edward, I can't... please don't tease... we'll have time later to..." She wasn't any more coherent than I was and I loved it. With a few more movements, we were both naked and I was fully ready to be inside her.

"C-condom?" I rasped at the last second.

"It's fine; don't worry, just... please... NOW," she fairly ordered, and without another moments hesitation, I was sliding in home. I had to close my eyes as I filled her completely, so overcome with every emotion and sensation currently bombarding me. All I could do was hold on to her hips, moan out her name, and hope to God I lasted longer than thirty seconds. I felt like a virgin all over again, except instead of feeling awkward, I simply felt overwhelmed.

"God, Bella, you feel..."

"I know," she whimpered, and wrapped her legs around my waist, pulling me in deeper. "Make love to me Edward," she added softly, nibbling on my earlobe as she did.

And I did.

* SC *

It wasn't surprising how easily our lives integrated after that. We were already living together, it was just a matter of moving her stuff into my room, and our kids took the news with little shock.

"It was just a matter of time," Charlotte mused the night we sat them down- all five of them- to tell them the good news. "You guys have been practically married for years."

I could see Rachel pale out of the corner of my eye, and I turned to her. She looked me in the eye for a moment, before darting her eyes down to her hands. She swallowed hard and stared at her rings like they were the most fascinating thing she'd ever seen. Clearly Charlotte's comment had upset her and I suspected it had to do with her father.

Everyone else was chattering around us. Riley and Maggie were whistling the wedding march, Charlotte was hugging Bella, and Garrett was texting, probably to Kate. He left in just three days for France so I didn't blame him for being preoccupied. But Rachel kept staring at her hands and I realized she was looking at the ring Jasper had given her on her thirteenth birthday.

"Rachel, can I talk to you?" I asked quietly. Everyone else was in a good mood, I didn't want to ruin the moment, but I felt like I needed to talk to her before she got more upset than she already was.

She nodded, frowning just like her mother did when something was deeply hurting inside, and followed me out onto the concrete stoop in the front of the house. Her arms were folded defensively in front of her chest, and it reminded me of Bella when she felt like she was about to be scolded for something. Defensive but always afraid of being a disappointment.

"Are you OK?" I finally asked.

"I miss my dad," she finally gave. "This is harder than I expected it to be, seeing her with someone else."

I patted her arm in what I hoped wasn't an awkward gesture. "I'm not asking to replace your dad. I hope you understand that."

"I know that," she said, finally looking at me. There were big tears in her eyes. "I'm sure I'm overreacting."

"You're not," I promised. "I know it can't be easy."

"It's not," she shook her head. "I miss him every day. They were so happy together."

"I know," I said. "I hope to make her happy too."

"Oh, you do," she gave, smiling a little. "Even if you weren't together, you make her happy. I'm... I'm glad it's you."

The front door opened, and Bella stepped out, shutting it quietly behind her. "Are you guys OK out here?" she asked, looking between us, a little wrinkle of concern on her forehead.

"Yeah," Rachel said, brushing away her tears. Bella reached out and they hugged for a long time. Bella whispered something in her daughter's ear to make her laugh, and then Bella pulled back, sliding her arm around my waist. Moments later, we were joined by all of our children, all giving their reasons for leaving. We hugged everyone, and waved goodbye as they went off to their own blossoming lives.

"I feel so old sometimes," Bella laughed after the last car had pulled away from the curb.

I nudged her ribs playfully. "Speak for yourself, babe."

"You're four months older than me," she teased. "Maybe you're just getting senile, returning to your second youth."

"If I were so old, could I still do this?" I smirked and in an extremely bold, and probably fool-hardy move, I swept her up in my arms, bridal style. She squealed and clung to me as I huffed a little.

"Did I put out your back baby?" she giggled, playing with the gray streak in my hair.

"Let's go see..." I grinning, still feeling the twinges, but knowing it was well worth the Advil I'd take later. I kicked the door shut behind us and took us to our bedroom.

_Our _bedroom.

**A/N II: Awww? Eww? Hehehe, let me know what you thought! **


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